This entire week it is going to be 80 degrees in Denver. I LOVE sunny weather a LOT, so hearing things like that is music to my ears. In my head, sun = happy. You know what it also means to some people, though… BEACH SEASON! I saw this article posted today and had to share it with you all.
Beach season, which should be one of the happiest thoughts in the world, unfortunately also leads to a wave of stress in people’s minds. WHY?! Oh, right… because we don’t have PERFECT bodies. Maybe if we don’t eat for a few days, or workout 4 times per day, or deprive ourselves of food or drink that makes us happy, we’ll be able to lose those “last few pounds”, right?
C’mon, people! Now let me qualify this by saying I have been really bad about that in my life. I still do have bouts of being unsatisfied with my appearance, but here’s the deal…. it’s stupid. In my opinion, our goal at the end of the day should be simple; Be healthy. If you have a spare tire, or a few extra pounds, and you’re conscious of what you put into your body and make smart food decisions most of the time, odds are you’re healthy. And that is something to be REALLY grateful for in this life!
Aside from that, I think our stress levels should be decreased by about 80%! I think one of my favorite comedians, Kevin James, said it best:
“My fitness goals are different than most peoples. Most people want to lose enough weight so they look good in a bathing suit or they want to lower their cholesterol. I just want to lose enough so my stomach doesn’t jiggle when I brush my teeth.”
Check out the awesome article “How to Get That Perfect Beach Body” ~ by Hamilton Nolan by clicking here. Here are some of my favorite quotes, though…
***NOTE – there is some “vulgar” language featured… if you don’t like that, stop reading here.***
- Allow me to posit to you, in the spirit of Ultimate Hardcoreness™, this idea: you have the perfect beach body already. Do you have the perfect body? No. You do not. In all likelihood your body suffers from myriad physical flaws which we won’t go into here except to just nod meaningfully at your undeveloped quadriceps. But you do not need the perfect body to go to the beach. You just need your body to go to the beach. The beach—despite being full of assholes, in many parts of the country—is supposed to be fun.
- You don’t need visible abs to go to the beach. You don’t need baseball-shaped biceps to go to the beach. You don’t need perfect curves, a slim figure, or a nice tan to go to the beach. You, with the body in which you currently reside, pale/ fat/ scrawny/ mediocre though it may be, should go the beach and have some f***ing fun. You should put on your bathing suit, take off your shirt, apply sunscreen, and frolic in the water.
- Should you work out Ultimate Hardcore™ style all year round in order to infuse yourself with a sense of empowering hardcoreness that will fill you with confidence and energy and contribute to your physical and mental health far more than any desperate vanity-driven crash diet ever could? Yes. Yes you should. But that is a matter of general lifestyle advice. It has nothing to do with your “beach body.” You, Shlubby McCouchsitter, have every bit as much right to go to the god damn beach as Mr. Universe does.